16 Biggest Regrets People Have After Turning 50—And How to Prevent Them

Turning fifty—and beyond—often brings clarity: the past is unchangeable, but tomorrow is wide open. A 2024 AARP survey found that 6 in 10 Americans over 50 wish they’d hit pause on certain earlier decisions, especially financial ones. Yet 80% say they’re more confident in creating change now than ever before. “If you get to the end of your life with no regrets at all, you probably haven’t lived that interesting a life,” Karl Pillemer, a gerontologist at Cornell University, told TODAY back in 2017 about his conversations with older Americans. “But they can’t believe how people waste their time. Petty fights, resentments, and worry.” Here, experts share the top things people wish they’d done differently after turning 50, and how you can course-correct today to feel happier and healthier in every aspect of life.

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Pillemer and his team spoke with 1,500 over 65 about their biggest regrets, one of which was not resolving a family estrangement, for example with a child. “The kinds of things that seemed worth saying ‘My way or the highway’ when you were 40 and they were 18 usually never seem worth it at 80,” Pillemer says.

“Even if their relationships with their other children were great, the one with whom there was this irreparable rift still caused them a lot of remorse and anguish.”

Many older adults regret not saving more when they were younger. “Life events kept them from saving, and now those decisions made back in their 40s, 50s and even as early as 30s are really biting them,” Kevin Chancellor, CEO of Black Lab Financial, tells AARP.

“It’s making it hard for them to live a good quality life with the cost of things so much higher.”

Neglecting health is one of the biggest regrets for people over 50. “Many people will say to themselves, ‘I enjoy smoking’ or ‘I don’t like to exercise’ or ‘I just like to eat — who cares if I die a little sooner?'” Pillemer says.

“The problem is in this day and age is you’re not going to die sooner; you’re going to be stuck with 10 or 20 years of chronic disease as modern medicine keeps you alive.”

Many regret not spending more time with loved ones. “The people I worked with often regretted taking their families for granted,” Grace Bluerock, LCSW, tells MindBodyGreen.

“After all, once they got terminally ill, it was their families who stuck by them to hold their hand, provide love and companionship, and care for them around the clock.”

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Working too hard and neglecting family is a big regret. “Many had worked long, hard hours, and they regretted missing the important moments in their kids’ lives,” Bluerock says.

“I remember one such person—a salesman whose boss expected him to travel three weeks each month when he had a young daughter at home. Although he was an excellent provider for her, he never got to know her well. As she became older, he tried to form a relationship with her, but it was too late to make up for lost time. He never fully forgave himself for choosing time at work over time with her.”

Pillemer says not traveling was a frequently expressed regret, even for people who traveled extensively when they were younger.

“If you have a choice between a kitchen remodel and a trip, I say take the trip,” one older woman told him.

Many older people looked back with regret for not being honest.

“Lying and being deceitful to others gnaws at older people when they reflect back, whether it was cheating someone, having an affair or being dishonest,” Pillemer says.”Experiencing dishonesty from others was haunting, too.”

Not following their dreams is a big regret for many. “Many expressed that they had never enjoyed their job but had stuck with it year after year to pay the bills,” Bluerock says. “They wished instead that they had chosen work that was in line with their purpose and passions—work that they were excited about and gave them a sense of fulfillment.”

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Some older adults regret holding back when expressing their feelings.

“They regretted not taking risks to be more loving, such as being more open about their feelings for new people or more affectionate with those already in their lives,” minister Lydia Sohn told CNBC.

Many wish they had been more careful before getting married.

One woman told Pillemer it’s better not to marry at all than to marry the wrong person.

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Many wish they had spent more time on self-care. “Most patients thought that if they’d eaten better, slept more, and paid more attention to their health and well-being, they might not have gotten sick,” Bluerock says.

“They wished they had made self-care more of a priority. Make time to go on a nature walk or meditate every day.

Nurse Bonnie Ware says many older people wished they had said how they really felt.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

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Ware says many felt bad about not keeping up with friends.

“Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.”

Many older people wish they had been happier. “Most people regretted the time they wasted worrying about things beyond their control,” Bluerock says.

“They didn’t realize they were capable of choosing fun and happiness until it was too late.”

Many older adults regret spending so much time worrying and being hard on themselves.

“Life is so short. What you will regret is weeks or months of the kind of mindless, self-destructive ruminating worrying that people do,” older study participants told Pillemer. “You’re going to wish you had that time back.”

Not expressing more love and affection is another big regret people expressed.

“Many people expressed sorrow for not having been more understanding, caring, and present for the people who were important to them,” Bluerock says. “They wished they had the courage to say ‘I love you’ more often.”

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Many think retirement marks the end of growth—but today, it can be the beginning. Whether it’s starting a small business, volunteering for a cause you care about, or pursuing a lifelong passion, defining your next chapter with purpose helps replace “I wish I had…” with “I’m glad I did.”

Enrollment in adult learning platforms (Coursera, MasterClass) for over-50s surged by 42% in 2024—proof that reinvention is alive and well.

Forget bland gym routines. Leveraging wearable fitness tech—like Garmin smartwatches or WHOOP bands—can track recovery, strength, and exercise data.

Recent studies show that people over 50 who use fitness wearables are 57% more consistent with their workouts. Pair tech insights with tele-health access to keep aging strong and injury-free.

Maybe you wish you’d spent less time isolated or stuck in routine. Now’s the moment to diversify your circle: join local co-ed teams, pick up a Meetup group, or co-work at community centers.

Social connection remains the #1 predictor of longevity after 50, according to Johns Hopkins research, and intercultural friendships can boost mental resilience.

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If you’ve ever regretted skimping on mindfulness or mental care, now is a chance to reset.

Play brain-training apps like Lumosity, meditate with Headspace, or attend local memory cafés. A 2023 meta-analysis found that regular cognitive training at midlife can delay mild cognitive impairment by nearly three years.

Regret over past spending or missed investments is common—but financial advisors say progress is always possible. Automate saving toward a bigger goal (like travel or supporting family) and consider part-time consulting to turn experience into extra income.

You can also invest in legacy projects—charitable giving, mentorship programs, or creative endeavors—as plans that fund both your financial future and emotional well-being.